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When an empath loves a narcissist…

There is no more toxic connection than the relationship between an empath and a narcissist.

Empaths are often mistakenly believed to be weak or victims of their own kindness. This is not the case at all. Empaths are strong, resilient people who are highly sensitive to the feelings and emotions of others. Only when narcissists enter the scene do they truly become “victims” if they fail to protect themselves and set boundaries.

Empaths want to heal the world and can’t bear to see anyone suffer. Therefore, they naturally attract irreparably damaged narcissists and their stories of suffering. But a narcissist doesn’t want to heal—a narcissist wants to manipulate, belittle, and, above all, continue to be a narcissist.

Even though most empaths sense that a relationship with a narcissist is an unhealthy choice, they don’t know exactly what they’re getting themselves into – until now.

Here are 17 things that happen when an empath loves a narcissist:

1. The narcissist provides the empath with a sense of security. An empath will feel a strong connection with the narcissist, even if the narcissist does nothing to express their feelings to the empath.

2. Empaths love to love. They enjoy making the other person feel “whole” again. But the problem is…the more love and care they give the narcissist, the more power and control the narcissist gains.

3. The narcissist will make the empath feel like the relationship is working well, but what’s really happening is that the narcissist is constantly seeking validation. They ask, “You love me, don’t you?” and quickly turn every conversation into one about themselves.

4. After a while, the narcissist begins to manipulate the empath in such a way that they experience enormous self-doubt. “I never said that,” “You’re crazy,” or “You’re just imagining it” are common phrases that quickly undermine the empath’s mental stability.

5. This leads to a controlling relationship for the narcissist. They convey to the empath the feeling that they depend on them for everything and that no one else would like them otherwise.

6. All of this manipulation and control causes depression and anxiety in many empaths. This only reinforces the empath’s belief that they need the narcissist to feel okay again. They become alienated, and the narcissist becomes their entire world.

7. Everything a narcissist says or does is a direct attack on the empath’s personal reality. They can take away the joy and normalcy he or she once had in your life and lead you to a dark place where feelings of inadequacy and worthlessness are commonplace because everything the empath does is wrong.

8. At some point, the empath reaches breaking point in the relationship. The person they once were becomes a different person, and friends and family no longer recognize them.

9. Conflict in the relationship escalates because the empath takes on traits of their partner. Eventually, they begin to realize that their emotional needs aren’t being met and demonstrate this by saying, “My needs are important too.” The narcissist, in turn, sees this as selfish.

10. What neither of them realizes is that even if the relationship ends (and it will), both will continue to suffer. The narcissist will enter into further, equally toxic relationships.

11. And the empath will continue to experience the narcissist’s abuse, because it acts like a poison in the brain and body. It penetrates every cell with only one intention: to destroy the reality of its target.

12. After the relationship breaks down, the empath sees him or her self as the problem. Of course it’s the empath’s fault, he thinks, he’s somehow failed. All the narcissist’s toxic words haunt him, and he thinks, “Maybe I was really selfish about my needs.”

13. The empath fails to recognize something important—there’s nothing wrong with them, and they haven’t failed. They were simply manipulated, used, and lied to by someone who had no compunction about hurting another person.

14. This is the beginning of the empath’s transformation. It’s a painful process, but so is being with a narcissist. They begin to understand that in order to grow, they must reevaluate the healing process. Everyone is worthy of love, but not everyone deserves trust.

15. The empath will heal. It requires the recognition that they, too, are broken and damaged, like the narcissist, but they are willing to acknowledge this, unlike the narcissist.

16. The narcissist will simply seek out his next victim, unaware that he himself is causing his own unhappiness.

17. The empath will grow from this experience and realize that they need to protect and balance parts of themselves in order to live a wiser and more enriching life…

~ copied and edited from quora

The above is all true… I heard what he was saying and saw the things he did. I knew he was lying, straight to my face. I wanted to believe that what he was saying would eventually be the truth. The more time I gave him, the worse things got. The deeper he dug his hole.

Empaths are often asked why they don’t spot red flags in relationships when they’re so good at reading energy.

The truth is, it’s not that they don’t see it – they sense everything almost right away. The real challenge lies in their desire to see the good in people. They want to believe the best in others, even when the signs point to something harmful or cruel. They see the red flags, but it takes them a little longer to accept that someone who claims to love them could be causing harm.

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