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August 4, 2025 (Gregorian calendar/Day 215)
Monday, Hamle 28, 2017 (Ethiopian calendar/11th month)
Karar ררכ 11 (Enochian calendar/5th month/heat of summer)
July 20, 2025 (International Fixed calendar)
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13.0.12.14.9 11 Muluc 7 Yaxk’in’ (Mayan Long Count calendar)
Sturgeon Moon ~ August 9
in 1753 21-year-old George Washington becomes a master mason

Why does a narcissist always say that it is you that has the attitude?

Because at his core a narcissist is a five-year-old with bad manners and a bad attitude and wrong thinking, and this is their team cheer:

I’m rubber and you’re glue. Whatever you say bounces off me and sticks to you.

You remember this old chestnut, right? You probably had a kid or two say it to you somewhere along the way. Maybe a brother or a sister, as well. This is the favored, obnoxious chant of siblings around the world.

It’s right up there with “calm down.”

You know, when you’re already calm, and your little brother tells you loudly to “calm down”, until finally you’re screaming at the top of your lungs at him “I AM CALM”, and he’s right there ready to point out to your parents how unhinged you’ve become.

A narcissist is someone who is at war with himself.

Inside each of them is chaos and turmoil and an ocean of unhappiness, deeper than the Marianas Trench.

Their false self came into being to protect their vulnerable creme center from the melting influence of the powerful spotlight of truth.

Their false self doesn’t live in reality because their true self doesn’t want it to.

The “I’m rubber you’re glue” trope comes out at the precise moment you’re trying (naively, I might add) to tell the narcissist some grown-up truth: that they have a bad attitude, or they are treating you badly, or they have hurt you.

The narcissist feels nothing at all familiar when you level this accusation.

Your reasonable words feel completely alien to the narcissist. And what you’re saying threatens to make them feel bad.

The narcissist looks around to see who is in the vicinity could possibly be trying to make them feel so bad, and all they see is you and them.

It can’t be them, they figure, so it must be you. They’re not out to get you. It’s really the way they see it.

When you start thinking about narcissism in this way, framing it in terms of YOU, you’ve already gotten the basics of narcissism fundamentally wrong.

Narcissists aren’t out to get you.

They would never look at it that way. A narcissist isn’t about you at all. You don’t figure into the equation.

The false self – with it’s chocolate-coated shell of grandiosity – protects them from shame, an emotion they are unable to process.

Shame is like battery acid to a narcissist.

Their false self shields them against the vicissitudes (fluctuations, changes, ups and downs, and uncertainties) of life and from any uncomfortable reality – for instance that they’re bad people, or they hurt others, or they’re wrong or have a hidden agenda.

So why do they say you have an attitude when it’s them that has the attitude?

Because it’s what they believe.

They’ve spent a lifetime telling themselves a story.

A story about who they are.

A story about what they do.

A story about their intelligence, their looks, their kindness, and their compassion.

In the end, when faced with a choice between the harshness of cold reality or the soft, warm story they wrap themselves in like a velveteen blanket, they will choose the story every time.

So don’t bother telling the narcissist to adjust their attitude. They’ll only think it’s you.

When you know, go. ~ Myla

…copied from quora

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