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What if the person you think you trust the most
is actually lying to you but you don’t know it?

Narcs don’t usually tell big obvious lies. Their lies are usually quiet, easy to believe. And at the beginning, their lies can be loving and caring, and that’s what makes them so confusing.

But as you spend more time with the narc, those little lies start having an effect on you. You start doubting yourself, you question your feelings and memory and sometimes even your reality. You also start feeling like you are the problem… like you are too sensitive or too difficult to deal with.

And that my darling is not a coincidence… that’s control. Because narcs usually use lies as tools to keep that control and also keep you emotionally hooked. And the longer it goes on, the harder it becomes for you to see what’s happening.

~ quora

1. I love you.
The first lie that a narcissist is going to tell you is that they love you. Within two weeks to a month, you’re going to hear, “I love you” out of that narcissist’s mouth. And that is just a straight-up lie. Because the narcissist doesn’t know you. So if they don’t know you, how do they love you? You can’t love somebody that you don’t know. There’s no such thing as love at first sight. There’s lust at first sight. They may lust for you, like what they see, but the first lie you’re going to hear out of a narcissist’s mouth is that they love you.

2. I don’t remember.
Man, they love this. They love to say, “I don’t remember. I don’t even know what I did yesterday.” This is straight-up gaslighting. Narcissists always love to say, “I don’t remember. I don’t remember where I was last night. I don’t remember.” Now we’re dealing with the amnesia card because the narcissist knows there’s not much you could say if they’re sitting there saying, “Well, I don’t remember.” It’s a straight-up lie because if something happened recently or was a major to-do, the narcissist most definitely remembers. They love to play dumb. They love the dumb act.

…my narc did this all the time, but I will say that he blacked out a lot due to the whiskey he drank. He couldn’t even keep his lies straight, and he always blamed it on his age. I might be young, but I’m not stupid, I caught on real quick.

3. It didn’t happen like that.
Now, they’re trying to rewrite history. They’re trying to rewrite what the truth is. And this is what causes you to get that cognitive dissonance, that confusion in your brain because you saw what they did, you heard what they did, but now the narcissist is trying to gaslight you, saying it didn’t happen that way, or it’s all in your head. Now, you’re going to start to second-guess yourself. And this is what the narcissist wants you to do. They want you to second-guess yourself and think that you got it wrong. This is where you have to learn to trust yourself. Trust what you heard. Trust what you saw. And realize that if you’re feeling a certain way, there’s a reason that you’re feeling that way.

4. Saying you are crazy.
The fourth major lie out of a narcissist’s mouth, and you are definitely going to hear this if you’re dealing with a covert narcissist. You’ll hear it with all narcissists, but covert narcissists love this one. They love to say you’re crazy and then stonewall you and walk out. When a covert narcissist or any narcissist calls you crazy, guess what? You got them. And they don’t know what to say to you. So now they’re in panic mode. So now they’re going to try again to make you think that you are crazy.

5. You’re so insecure.
Again, it’s a projection. The narcissist is going to say, “You’re so insecure, ” the minute you ask them a question. You ask them
something like, “Where were you?” or “What were you doing?” or “Who were you with?” What is the first thing that comes out of their mouths? You’re insecure. When really, again, it’s the narcissist who’s really insecure. That’s why they’re narcissists because of that insecurity within themselves. And they become narcissistic to protect their inner ego. But they want to project their toxic qualities onto you and call you insecure.

6. You’re so jealous.
You’re so jealous of my friends. You’re so jealous of me because I have friends.” They love to say you’re jealous. Again, projection. The narcissist is the king and queen of being jealous of everybody else and being in competition with everybody else. But what are they going to do? They’re going to say, “You’re the jealous one.” I had a narcissist do this with me. Try to say, “Oh, you’re so jealous of your girlfriend.” And I’m like, “Where is this coming from?” Like, I never gave him any reason to even say. It didn’t come from anywhere. It came from the narcissist trying to cause trouble.

…I heard every one of these from my ex.

source: 6 Major Lies Narcissists Tell You –

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